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Hey everyone! Welcome to the 33rd edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. As you already know last month here on SuperMarcey.com I posted up poll with three bad movies and I said that whichever one out of those three films had the highest votes, I would watch and live-tweet for this column. Well, the votes are in and you all have spoken. For this installment of Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon, you guys wanted me to watch and live-tweet… KAZAAM! Is this really one of the worst family films released in the ’90s? Can I buy Shaq more as a genie than as a superhero? Read on and find out! Enjoy

Bede @BedeJermyn

I know I’ve said this many times before but I’m going to say it again: is it too late for me to NOT watch this film? #Kazaam

Oh, Shaq. You were great basketball player but sadly, you weren’t cut out to be an actor. #Kazaam

Yeah, I buy the idea of Shaq as a genie just as much as I buy Denise Richards as nuclear physicist. #Kazaam

You know how you can tell this film was made in the 90s? The score is done in style of New Jack Swing. #Kazaam

Here is our main character Max. Why do I get the feeling I’m REALLY not going to like this kid? #Kazaam

Homework malfunction? I don’t know what that is and I don’t want to know. #Kazaam

Now this isn’t realistic at all. No 12-year-old kid in the 90s would know who Buster Keaton is. That’s just ridiculous. #Kazaam

So Max’s Mum and her boyfriend are about to tell him that they are engaged. Yeah, Max is not going to take this news well. #Kazaam

The Mum’s boyfriend kind of looks like Steve Guttenberg. He’s probably the budget version. #Kazaam

Oh no! Some bullies are chasing after Max! It’s probably because they really wanted him to his hair cut. #Kazaam

Yes, Max. Hide in that old creepy looking abandoned building. Nothing bad won’t happened to you while your in there. #Kazaam

Max just three stories though a hole inside the building. If this was set in the real world he would definitely be dead for sure. #Kazaam

So… Instead living inside a magic lamb, Shaq lives inside a magic boom box. No, I’m not making this crap up! #Kazaam

Geez, not only is Shaq not cut out to be an actor, he’s a really bad rapper too. #Kazaam

Seriously, all his rhymes that he’s character is shouting are so badly written. I would have come up with better ones. #Kazaam

Come to think of it, why is Kazaam even rapping in the first place? It doesn’t make any sense. #Kazaam

You know for someone who has been in a magic lamp/boom box for thousands for years, I’m surprised that Kazaam knows what a car is. #Kazaam

The Mom’s boyfriend Travis seems like a really nice guy. No wonder Max doesn’t like him. #Kazaam

Is just me or was every kid character in 90s family film had parents who were going though an divorce? It seems like it. #Kazaam

Yep, cans get enough of that New Jack Swing sound. #Kazaam

Yeah, I think it’s a bit creepy that Shaq is following a young kid down the street. #Kazaam

Yeah, I’m sorry, Kazaam. You’re too bloody big to hide behind stuff. #Kazaam

Max is on his way to meet his biological Dad. Yeah, I have a feeling this is lot going to end well. #Kazaam

Yeah, that Father and son meeting didn’t go well. Even a blind person could have seen that coming a mile away. #Kazaam

What the hell is this place that Max is hiding out at? It looks bizarre. #Kazaam

Oh, no. Mid-90s CGI effects *Shudders* #Kazaam

Please, Shaq. Please stop rapping. #Kazaam

Why do I get the feeling Shaq wrote in his contract that he would only star in this film if he gets to rap all his dialogue. #Kazaam

You know it doesn’t surprise me at all that Max’s 1st wish would be to have a lot of junk food. Not world peace, junk food. Figures. #Kazaam

Geez, Max. Why didn’t you ask Kazaam to send all this food over to people who are suffering from hunger? What a jerk. #Kazaam

“Stop rhyming!” That’s the most truthful thing that Max has said to Kazaam in this entire film. #Kazaam

So this film is about a young while privileged kid ‘owning’ a black genie… There’s something seriously disturbing about that image #Kazaam

You know what, I don’t know what that white oozy stuff was in Max’s pocket. I’m already disturbed enough by this film as it is. #Kazaam

Also another thing: why is that kid in the ’90s was named Max? Couldn’t anyone else come up with other names? #Kazaam

Oh, hi Da Brat! It’s nice to see that GLITTER wasn’t the only terrible film that you’ve appeared in. #Kazaam

I like how Max’s real Dad goes into full Dad mode once he finds out that Max is his son. #Kazaam

Wait, Max hasn’t been back at his place in two days?! Did I hear that right?! #Kazaam

Geez, Max is such a jerk to his Mum. No wonder he’s completely unlikable. #Kazaam

I like how back in the 90s, one of the main fashion tends was clothes that look like that their made of aluminium foil. #Kazaam

Wait, are Kazaam and the rap group Salt ‘N’ Peppa an impromptu rap battle? This doesn’t make any sense. #Kazaam

Max’s Dad is in the piracy by business and their main resource is illegally record live shows and sell them on the black market. #Kazaam

People are eating goat eyes in this film… Eeeewwww! #Kazaam

Geez, Max and the bullies stealing a pirated cassette tape could be so seriously dramatic. #Kazaam

Max and Kazaam are sharing a bed together… Okay, it’s official. This is the most disturbing film of all time. #Kazaam

“You pervert!” This is second most truthful thing that Max has said in this film. #Kazaam

Kazaam is now having shower in Max’s while he is watching on. Yep, this film is getting more disturbing by the minute. #Kazaam

Oh, geez. There’s that terrible 90s CGI effects again. It’s just keeps getting worse as it goes along. #Kazaam

Wait, Kazaam was responsible for the destruction of Pompeii?! Oh my God. That makes him worst mass killer in all of history #Kazaam

Kazaam’s reckons that Max’s rapping was really awful. Clearly he has heard his ryhmes ’cause he’s own rapping is much worse! #Kazaam

Okay, now the film has turned into a music video all of a sudden. A really bad one as matter as fact. #Kazaam

Man, Shaq’s fashion sense in this film is hilariously awful. #Kazaam

Well… This film has suddenly shift its tone from silly family comedy to an intense drama in a split second. #Kazaam

So Max just few out of a glass of water that Kazaam was about to drink. Seriously, this is actually happening in this film. #Kazaam

I like how his teacher and classmates aren’t fazed that Max just suddenly appeared in burst of light in the class all of a sudden. #Kazaam

Okay, this film has seriously become a full-blown drama. It’s so completely jarring compared to what happened earlier. #Kazaam

Seriously, how own on earth is Kazaam headlining his own rap concert? He’s a terrible rapper! IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE!!! #Kazaam

Yeah, I bet these concert goers must have been paid a lot of money to pretend to enjoy Kazaam’s concert. #Kazaam

Oh, man. This film has gone so overdramatic now! #Kazaam

Holy crap! The bad guy just pushed Max down an elevator shaft and murdered him! WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON?!!! #Kazaam

Whoa! Kazaam is now going on the town on the bad guys! I think I’m having STEEL flashbacks. #Kazaam

Kazaam just swished the bad guy into a ball and then slam dunked him into a garbage shoot. Yeah, you read that correctly. #Kazaam

I suppose they make some kind of reference to Shaq’s basketball career somehow. It just feels so forced. #Kazaam

Yep, he’s dead. Max is totally dead right now. #Kazaam

Geez, even Shaq is given the classic “Noooo!!!” moment, it comes across as being really awkward. #Kazaam

Wait, Kazaam was somehow able to bring Max back to life. I suppose I should be happy but I’m like, “whatever”. #Kazaam

Okay, Kazaam has now turned into a giant ball of golden bright light ’cause he is now free. I do know why, he just did. #Kazaam

Well, it looks like Max’s real Dad might be going to jail. I think when Max wished him a second chance, I don’t think that was it. #Kazaam

Well, it looks like Max has finally accepted Travis as step-dad. Who didn’t see that coming too? #Kazaam

Now that Kazaam is free from being a genie, his new girlfriend wants him to go get a job. I’m pretty sure being a genie was a job. #Kazaam

Well, that’s the end of the film. After this and STEEL, I think it was a good idea that Shaq should have stuck to basketball. #Kazaam

Also I’m so very, very glad that he’s rap career didn’t take off either. That was something the world didn’t need. Thank God. #Kazaam

I hope everyone enjoyed reading this 34th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in February for my 33rd edition, which I could be doing on one of the following three bad films: FREDDY’S DEAD: THE FINAL NIGHTMARE, RHINESTONE and X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on SuperMarcey.com soon!

– Bede Jermyn