Bede’s Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon #94: Kangaroo Jack

Hey, everyone! Welcome to my 94th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. Apologies for the slight lateness of this edition. As you already know back in March on, I posted up poll with three bad movies and I said that whichever one out of those three films had the highest votes, I would watch and live-tweet for this column. Well, the votes are in and you all have spoken. For this 94th instalment of Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon, you guys wanted me to watch and live-tweet… KANGAROO JACK! Was this the worst cinematic crime to ever happen to Australia? Did we really need to see a CGI Kangaroo talk and rap even if it was only 5 minutes? Read on and find out! Enjoy!

Bede @BedeJermyn

I know I’ve said this a billion times before, but I’m going to say it again: is it too late for me to *not* watch this film? #KangarooJack

You know what’s weird? Until know I thought that this was a Disney production but in fact, it was actually produced by Warner Bros. Talk some Mandela Effect stuff right here. #KangarooJack

Is KANGAROO JACK the worst thing that has ever happened to Australia? Definitely not. However though, it’s a still pretty bloody bad thing that involved Australia regardless. #KangarooJack

Oh, hi, Christopher Walken! Unlike anyone else in this film, you walked out of the film with some dignity still attached. #KangarooJack

I don’t know why we’re getting this flashback with our two main characters Charlie & Louis. Sure it’s to establish their friendship but still… #KangarooJack

John Williams should have sued this film for using his classic SUPERMAN theme in this. #KangarooJack

Listen… Anthony Anderson can be a good actor when he wants to be but man… He’s character is so bloody annoying in this. #KangarooJack

He’s very clear looking into the eyes of everyone so far in this film, they would rather be anywhere else but here. #KangarooJack

Even when he is the crappiest of films, Christopher Walken continues to the best part of it. Hence why he is a legend. #KangarooJack

Between making this and GIGLI in the same year, 2003 wasn’t the best year for Walken. Thank goodness he had THE RUNDOWN later that year to help things out. #KangarooJack

Holy shit, a young Michael Shannon is in this film as Walken’s son! If that isn’t perfect father-son casting right there, I don’t know what is. #KangarooJack

Unfortunately it’s too bad that both Walken & Shannon has to play those roles in *this* film of all things. #KangarooJack

So… Walken sends Charlie & Lous down to Australia to deliver a package but in fact, they’re going there to get killed by of their latest mess up? Seems like a lot of effort when it would have been easier to just kill them right there. #KangarooJack

Okay, I got to admit. The gag where people-overhear-that-sounds-like-someone-doing-something-disgusting-but-in-fact-they-aren’t will always give me a little giggle. I’m immature what can I say. #KangarooJack

Brace yourselves: so many Australian stereotypes are coming. #KangarooJack

Also it wouldn’t be a film about Americans coming to Australia if the Men At Work song “Down Under” didn’t play at some point. #KangarooJack

So… Charlie & Louis drove all the way from Sydney to Alice Springs in one day? Yeah… Not accurate at all. It takes a few days to get there of you’re driving. #KangarooJack

Charlie & Louis just ran over a kangaroo and they are taking photos of its corpse… Sounds about right. #KangarooJack

I see. The kangaroo isn’t actually dead and it kicked the crap out of Charlie. I would to if I was in his situation too. #KangarooJack

So… Louis put the jacket with the money on the kangaroo and now they have to go after him. Dumb arses. #KangarooJack

I like to think that this scene with Charlie & Louis chasing kangaroo in their jeep is a homage to the disturbing kangaroo hunting scene in WAKE IN FRIGHT. #KangarooJack

It’s interesting to me that this film was originally suppose to be a dark R rated crime comedy but due to its bad test screenings, they decided to recut and reshoot the film into a family with more scenes of the CGI kangaroo. Explains everything really. #KangarooJack

Oh, the late great Bill Hunter. Aussie acting legend. #KangarooJack

Martin Coskas is in this film too. Even though he’s a Nee Zealander, he’s playing an Aussie and it’s the most full blown stereotypical Aussie accent I’ve ever heard. #KangarooJack

Oh, hi, Estella Warren! Remember when Hollywood tried to make Estella Warren a thing? Yeah, me neither. #KangarooJack

Yeah… These pointless scenes with the kangaroo Jackie Legs clearly weren’t reshoots added to the film. #KangarooJack

Of course Charlie & Louis would get Bill Hunter’s very drunk character to go fly a plane to go find the kangaroo. Of course they would. Dumb arses. #KangarooJack

To be once again, it’s Bill Hunter. So I’ll allow it. #KangarooJack

I complete how weird and dated early 2000s blockbuster filmmaking is. #KangarooJack

Oh, geez. The green screen in these flying scenes is really bad. It’s almost THE ROOM level bad. #KangarooJack

Marton Coskas’ Aussie accent sounds like a American trying to do an Aussie accent. #KangarooJack

WAIT A SECOND, HOLD THE PHONE! Michael Shannon just arrived in Australia and Charlie & Louis have only been here for not even a day?! THIS FILM IS TAKING SOME VERY BIG LEAPS WITH DISTANCE, TIME AND GEOGRAPHY!!! #KangarooJack

Uggghhhhh… I know this meant to be a family film but bloody hell… This film is so dumb on every level. #KangarooJack

Dammit! Charlie & Louis have been saved. A huge missed opportunity to not have them die in the desert. #KangarooJack

Charlie, thinking that Estella Warren is a mirage, grabs her breasts… Ummm… A family film? #KangarooJack

Oh, dear God, no! Charlie is having a dream of the kangaroo talking and doing a rap. This is horrible! #KangarooJack

Break dancing kangaroos. Now I’ve seen everything. #KangarooJack

Okay, I stand corrected. A kangaroo is now talking with Christopher Walken’s voice. NOW I’ve seen everything. #KangarooJack

So it’s finally night time. If the events of this film actually happened for real, it would take place during one week. #KangarooJack

You know for someone who’s been working as a ranger in the outback, Estella Warren is done up like a supermodel. #KangarooJack

A camel just farted… This bloody movie, man. This bloody movie. #KangarooJack

The camels are still farting… Ughhhhhh… #KangarooJack

I still can’t believe Michael Shannon flew all the from Brooklyn to Sydney and then drove to Alice Springs in less than a day. Amazing. #KangarooJack

We’re gonna need a montage! MONTAGE! #KangarooJack
“Should have never left the pub” I agree, Bill Hunter. I agree. #KangarooJack
Oh, dear God. Charlie, Louis & Jesse are wearing Australian First Nations face paint… I don’t want to accuse this them of cultural appropriation but… Yeah… #KangarooJack
Yeah… This scene with Jesse having a shower in this waterfall doesn’t feel gratuitous at all. #KangarooJack
The guy who made his directorial debut with COYOTE UGLY made *this* his follow-up directing effort and afterwards, he never directed another film again. Watching this, I’m not surprised at all. #KangarooJack
I’m surprised that it took Marton Coskas to find the gang given how close and confined this place seems to be close to everything else in Australia. #KangarooJack
Oh, yeah. Dyan Cannon plays as Charlie’s Mum in this film. Well, you wouldn’t even know that because she’s only in the film for 20 seconds and that was in the flashback sequence. #KangarooJack
Man, these scenes with the kangaroo are so… so… dumb… #KangarooJack
I like how that even though he’s trying so hard to play an Aussie, Marton Coska’s Kiwi accent keeps shining though on occasion. #KangarooJack
Its okay, Michael Shannon. You’ll start in better films after this. #KangarooJack
It’s funny how even a dumb arse of film this is, Michael Shannon still gives off a intense and intimidating performance. #KangarooJack
Dumbest camel chase scene ever. #KangarooJack
You know why I think that Michael Shannon is giving a intense performance in this? It’s probably because he was pissed off that he has to star in this film. #KangarooJack
Charlie just saved Louis from falling off a cliff. Dammit. They both should have gone over and this film would have been over. #KangarooJack
Well, the bad guys have been arrested and everything has turned out well in the end. #KangarooJack
I hope everyone got paid well for being in this film. #KangarooJack
After everything they’ve gone through, Charlie should dump Louis. He was a awful friend. Yes, even if his dumb arse decision to put the jacket on the kangaroo kind of saved them in the end. #KangarooJack
Jackie Leggs has a wife and child and… Holy shit!… The bit where Jackie’s child kicks Charlie in the face, they just reused the same footage that from scene earlier when Jackie kicked Charlie. Talk about bloody lazy! #KangarooJack
I imagine Christopher Walken all his scenes for this film in one day. #KangarooJack
Oh, dear God. The Kangaroo is back and he’s talking again. And also doing celebrity impressions. Bloody hell… #KangarooJack
Well, that’s the end of KANGAROO JACK. Only something this bad could have only have been released in 2003. So, so terrible. As an Aussie, this film offends me and feels like an attack to my home country. #KangarooJack
I hope you all enjoyed reading this 94th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in a few weeks for my 95th edition, which I could be doing on one of the following three bad films: AMERICAN PSYCHO 2, LAWNMOWER MAN 2: BEYOND CYBERSPACE and S. DARKO. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on soon!

Article written by Bede Jermyn


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