Bede’s Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon #84 (7th Anniversary Edition): Freddy Got Fingered

Hey, everyone! Welcome to my 84th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. Sincere apologies for the lateness of this latest edition of the column once again. Apologies for slight lateness of this edition. I was originally going to post this at the end of May as planned (since that was the month when I first launched this column 8 years ago) but between quarantine, work, going away and family visiting, I just didn’t have the time to then. Plus with everything that’s going on in the world politically and socially over the pass two weeks, it just didn’t seem appropriate to do the article until now. If you remember back in early May, I decided for this edition that I wasn’t going to you let guys decide which bad film I was going to watch and I wasn’t going to pick it myself. Why was that you ask? It’s because this one marks the 7th anniversary of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon column. 7 years. I can’t believe it’s been that long. So which bad film have I chosen for the 84th/7th anniversary edition of the article? I decided that I was going to do it on one of the absolute worst films I have ever seen in my entire life: the 2001 Tom Green vehicle FREDDY GOT FINGERED. Why did Fox Studios give $14 millon to make this atrocity? Does this abomination really deserve the cult following it has been getting the pass 19 years? Read on and find out! Enjoy!

Bede @BedeJermyn

I know I’ve said it a billion tomes before, but I’m say it again: is it too late for me to *not* watch this film? Seriously, I want to know. I don’t want to watch this film again! Loudly crying faceLoudly crying faceLoudly crying faceLoudly crying faceLoudly crying face #FreddyGotFingered

Even though Fox has made a lot of bone head decisions in their entire history as a studio, is this making this film the biggest one of them all? Yes. I believe it is. #FreddyGotFingered

Now that superhero films are all the rage at the moment, I’m surprised Tom Green’s character’s comic X-RAY CAT into a film. #FreddyGotFingered

Remember when Tom Green was a thing? Yeah, me neither. Thank God. #FreddyGotFingered

This skateboard scene is probably the only good legit scene in this entire film. #FreddyGotFingered

Poor Rip Torn and Julie Hagerty… Why are you here? Did Tom Green have something incriminating on you both? #FreddyGotFingered

Is it just me, or does AMERICAN PIE series star Eddie Kaye Thomas, who plays Freddy, looks like a young Nicolas Cage? #FreddyGotFingered

*Sigh*… We’re not even 10 minutes in and Tom Green is masturbating a horse. Cinema… I guess. #FreddyGotFingered

AAAAHHHHH!!!!!! Bloody hell I hate Gordy so much. SO. MUCH. #FreddyGotFingered

Bloody hell. What the hell is Tom Green doing in this cheese sandwich factory? Seriously, who would let him work there? He’s an idiot. #FreddyGotFingered

Drew Barrymore has appeared (again… why are you here too?). I know that she and Tom Green use to be married but I like to imagine that the main reason why she divorced him, was because saw this film. #FreddyGotFingered

“YOU’RE A SKINNY LOSER!!!” The most correct thing in this whole film so far. #FreddyGotFingered

“You expect someone to give you a TV show?” “Well, if not that, maybe $14 million to make a film instead”. #FreddyGotFingered

“It doesn’t make sense. It’s stupid.” What audiences thought after watching this film. #FreddyGotFingered

“It sucks!” Again… what audiences fought after watching this film. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, Anthony Michael Hall. I know you haven’t been in anything relevant prior to making this film but seriously, you deserve better than this too. #FreddyGotFingered

I know I should feel sorry for Gord right now but seriously, I don’t. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh no. Gord has just found a deer carcass. I can only imagine what’s gonna happen now… *Sigh*. #FreddyGotFingered

Tom Green is dancing around inside a hollowed our deer carcass right now. God, this film. #FreddyGotFingered

Tom Green just got run over a truck. As far as I’m concerned, the film should have ended right there. #FreddyGotFingered

Tom Green is now watching two horses have sex. Cinema again… I guess. #FreddyGotFingered

Rip Torn screaming at the top of his lungs is how I feel watching this film. #FreddyGotFingered

Gord’s friend just broke his leg on his skate ramp and now Gord is licking the broken bone that’s pierced through the skin. I wish I was making this up, but unfortunately I’m not. #FreddyGotFingered

“CAN YOU PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP, PLEASE!!!” Lady… I feel your pain right now. #FreddyGotFingered

Me throughout this film so far. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, dear God. Gord is helping a woman give birth. Please, no. #FreddyGotFingered

Gord just bit the baby’s umbilical cord and is swinging it around the room. Why… WHY… WHY!!! #FreddyGotFingered

You know why I hate Gord so much as a character? Other than being screeching idiot manchild? Is that he so cruel and mean-spirited as well. #FreddyGotFingered

So… Gord is caning his new wheel-chaired girlfriend Betty on her legs? Somehow this least weirdest thing that has happened in this film so far. #FreddyGotFingered

Remember, people. Rip Torn is an Oscar nominee. An Oscar. Nominee. #FreddyGotFingered

Damn. I’ve never realised until now that not only does Eddie Kaye Thomas look like young Nic Cage, he even sounds like him, too. #FreddyGotFingered

As much as I hate this film with every fibre of my being, I will that Tom Green casting Rip Torn as his Dad is spot on casting. They really look alike. #FreddyGotFingered

50 Shades of Gord. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, geez. Gord & Betty are going out to a restaurant. This is not going to end well. #FreddyGotFingered

Ah, early 2000s mobile phones. They always looked like the size of a brick. #FreddyGotFingered

I know I should be laughing at the running gag of the kid next door to Gord’s place getting seriously injured every time he appears, but it’s just so unnecessarily mean. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, dear God! Not the “Daddy, would you like some sausage?” song!!! #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, geez. We’ve now come to the scene we’re the film has gotten its title from. Ugh. #FreddyGotFingered

This movie, man. This whole damn movie. #FreddyGotFingered

Yeah… I could have gone my whole life without seeing Rip Torn baring his arse and slapping it. #FreddyGotFingered

I wonder if the person who green-lit this film and gave Tom Green $14 million to make it if regrets that decision? #FreddyGotFingered

Yeah. This whole subplot with Gord falsely accusing his Dad of fingering Freddy definitely would not fly in a film today. Not that it did even back in 2001. #FreddyGotFingered

You know what? I’m 100% convinced that most of the film’s $14 million budget went straight towards the soundtrack. #FreddyGotFingered

“Gord, I’m going to greenlight this project.” Big mistake. HUGE. #FreddyGotFingered

Yeah… This ZEBRAS IN AMERICA cartoon looks… Terrible. #FreddyGotFingered

How is it possible that the fake plant that was in Gord’s mouth was more of a real human being than he is? #FreddyGotFingered

Gord & Betty: still a better love story than TWILIGHT. Not by much though. #FreddyGotFingered

Seriously, how can Rip Torn not see Gord standing in front of the bed? It’s barely dark at all. #FreddyGotFingered

“WHAT IS GOING ON?!” Don’t worry, Rip Torn. The film is almost over and I still don’t know that answer. #FreddyGotFingered

Great. First Gord masturbates a horse, now he is masturbating an elephant. Ughhhhhhhhhhhh. #FreddyGotFingered

Brace yourselves: a sentimental scene where father and son finally bond is coming. #FreddyGotFingered

Oh, thank, God. Gord & his Dad has been kidnapped. Couldn’t have happened to nicer people. #FreddyGotFingered

What?! The Mum is dating Shaquille O’Neil? Good trade. #FreddyGotFingered

Poor, Shaq. Between this film, KAZAAM and STEEL, he has starred in three of the some worst films I have ever seen in my entire life. #FreddyGotFingered

Wait, Goes and his Dad were rescued? #FreddyGotFingered

There’s a guy in the crowd that has a sign that says, “WHEN IS THIS FILM GOING TO FUCKING DEAD?!”… He’s now the character that I relate to the most from this film. #FreddyGotFingered

Now the film ends with the kid next door getting decapitated by an aeroplane propeller. Classy. #FreddyGotFingered

Worst. Funny end credit outtakes. Ever. #FreddyGotFingered

“What the fuck am I doing?” I agree, Tom Green. What the fuck are you doing? #FreddyGotFingered

Well, that’s end of the film. I can see why people see it as a cult film but for me personally, this is one of the absolute worst films I have ever seen in my entire life. #FreddyGotFingered

I hope everyone enjoyed reading this 84th/7th anniversary edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in later this month for my 85th edition, which I could be doing on one of the following three bad films: FATEFUL FINDINGS, NORTH or SWEPT AWAY. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on soon!

Written by Bede Jermyn


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