Hey everyone! Welcome to the 24th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. If you remember from last month, I decided for this edition of the series that I wasn’t going to you guys decide which bad film I was going to watch. Why was that you ask? ‘Cause this month actually marks the 2nd anniversary of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon column. So I thought that to celebrate this special occasion, instead of asking you readers to pick which bad film I should watch and live-tweet, I would instead pick the film myself. So which bad film have I chosen for the 24th/2nd anniversary edition of the article? I’m going to be doing it one of my all time favourite bad movies, which probably nearly all of you have never heard: the obscure 1966 Japanese superhero film THE GOLDEN BAT! Enjoy!
Bede @BedeJermyn
You know if I ever become a superhero, I want my theme song to be the one that’s playing over the open credits #TheGoldenBat
I like how the opening credits are basically the Golden Bat dancing around and voguing out Madonna-style in silhouette #TheGoldenBat
Space… The final frontier… #TheGoldenBat
I think its funny that this cop thinks its suspicious that someone gazing up at the stars with a telescope at night. #TheGoldenBat
You can definitely tell this film was made the 60s cause no one can get away with telling a cop to be quiet #TheGoldenBat
So this kid sees something move in the night sky, and he automatically thinks that the world is in danger? Okay. #TheGoldenBat
I like how this scientist is basically tells the teen that he is an idiot. I don’t blame him at all. #TheGoldenBat
Yeah, I’m pretty sure isn’t a planet in our solar system named Icarus. #TheGoldenBat
Meanwhile in space, a giant fireball that’s dangling on a wire is heading towards Earth #TheGoldenBat
Wow there’s a spaceship that looks a screw. Seriously I’m joking about this! That’s what it looks like! #TheGoldenBat
What the hell is that thing?! #TheGoldenBat
Why is the villain look a chipmunk mascot for a very amateur second-rate football team. He doesn’t look threatening at all. #TheGoldenBat
Seriously, he looks weird! He also has 4 eyes and a claw that looks like the one the Claw from INSPECTOR GADGET has #TheGoldenBat
Well, these Men In Black looking wannabes aren’t being very subtle when it comes to stalk that teen in their car #TheGoldenBat
“Who are you?! Why are you wearing sunglasses at night?! Who do you think you are?! Bono?! #TheGoldenBat
Geez, the teen was just kidnapped 5 seconds ago and he’s already fallen asleep. #TheGoldenBat
Plus it just went from being night to day pretty quickly as well. #TheGoldenBat
Oh, my God… Cheap sets! #TheGoldenBat
Of course the teen’s name is Akira. It’s a pretty common name in Japan. #TheGoldenBat
Yeah, Akira being both intelligent and talented is a bit of a stretch #TheGoldenBat
HOLY CRAP! The main scientist in the this film is played by Sonny Chiba! Awesome! We’re gonna some arse kicking for sure! #TheGoldenBat
I don’t think I’ve seen a film that has so much happening in the first 10 minutes than this film does. #TheGoldenBat
I like how Sonny Chiba’s organisation gives Akira a job to on their team within the first 30 seconds of meeting him #TheGoldenBat
Uh, oh. A child actor. She’s going to annoy the crap out of us for the rest of the film, isn’t she? #TheGoldenBat
I like how the only white dude in the film has the thickest Japanese accent of all time. He was clearly dubbed over. #TheGoldenBat
That laser is called the Hyper-Annihilator Beam Cannon? That’s the best name for a weapon ever! #TheGoldenBat
Quick! Look busy by randomly pressing buttons! #TheGoldenBat
Thunderbirds are go! #TheGoldenBat
Sonny Chiba’s jet is called Space-Car 2? Geez, the filmmakers aren’t trying to come up with good names #TheGoldenBat
“Doctor! That island isn’t on the charts.” That’s because it’s the LOST island! Stay away from it! #TheGoldenBat
Yes. If you find an mysterious island that’s not on any map in the world, the first thing you do is to investigate it #TheGoldenBat
MODELS. #TheGoldenBat
Why is everybody wearing suits that look like they were made out of aluminum foil? #TheGoldenBat
Don’t worry everyone! That other team isn’t dead. They just went out on a massive bender the night before. #TheGoldenBat
Hey Calista Flockhart! Oh, wait. That’s a just skeleton. My mistake. #TheGoldenBat
Wait, the mysterious island that they’re on is actually Atlantis? This film is getting weirder and weirder by the minute. #TheGoldenBat
I like how these giant rocks and pillars are literally bouncing around all over the place as this earthquake is happening #TheGoldenBat
That giant screw looking spaceship we saw has just come out of the ocean and is shooting lasers at everyone! #TheGoldenBat
OMG the mutant chipmunk mascot looking bad guy is named Nazo! This is becoming even more hilarious! #TheGoldenBat
Nazo’s evil laugh is pretty epic! #TheGoldenBat
Hey, I didn’t know Nazo had his own Foot clan! #TheGoldenBat
Man, the sound effects in this film are hilarious lol #TheGoldenBat
I’m not sure what the budget for this film was, but I’m pretty sure it might have been at lest $10 #TheGoldenBat
No! Don’t go towards the light! #TheGoldenBat
So The Golden Bat lives in a sarcophagus. Does that mean he’s a mummy? #TheGoldenBat
You know for someone who has been dormant for a 1000 years, the Golden Bat is pretty stylish #TheGoldenBat
Why is the Golden Bat wearing Mickey Mouse gloves? #TheGoldenBat
The sound all the evil henchman make when they get shot is hilarious. It’s just the same scream over and over again. #TheGoldenBat
Umm. How does the kid know that to revive the Golden Bat, she’s has to throw water on him? #TheGoldenBat
Attention! Attention! We have a fake bat on string flying around! Do not be alarmed! #TheGoldenBat
By the power of the plastic bat on a string, I demand you to rise Golden Bat! #TheGoldenBat
WAZZUUUPPPPPP!!!!! #TheGoldenBat
Oh, man. The Golden Bat’s costume is pretty epic. He looks like a cross between Skeletor and Liberace. Seriously, he does! #TheGoldenBat
OMG The Golden Bat’s laugh is even more hilarious and terrifying than the villian’s laugh. It’s amazing! #TheGoldenBat
Now the Golden Bat is now going around beating up all the evil henchman with his whacking stick! This is awesome! #TheGoldenBat
For some reason, that fake plastic bat just landed on the kid and turned itself into a pendant. I’m not making this up! #TheGoldenBat
OMG The Golden Bat is flying around in front of a green screen! This film just more amazing by the minute! #TheGoldenBat
Uh, oh. Nazo is pissed off right about now! #TheGoldenBat
I like how the Golden Bat pretty much nearly destroys Nazo’s ship only after hitting it a few times with his whacking stick #TheGoldenBat
Please Golden Bat, stop doing that! You’re laugh is scaring the crap out of me. #TheGoldenBat
You know for a film called THE GOLDEN BAT, you would think this film this film should have been shot in colour but noooooo #TheGoldenBat
But for some reason, they shot this film in B&W instead. What an absolute missed opportunity #TheGoldenBat
Oh, man. Nazo’s tantrums are hilarious! #TheGoldenBat
Uh, oh. Nazo’s main three henchman have arrived. One of them looks scarily like Two-Face from BATMAN FOREVER #TheGoldenBat
The second one is wearing a lot of mascara and the third looks like Wolverine from the X-MEN. This is hilarious! #TheGoldenBat
So when is Sonny Chiba gonna bust out and fight people? I’m still waiting.#TheGoldenBat
The whip-panning that the filmmakers use every time somebody jumps in this film is amazing #TheGoldenBat
Ah, security guards. There’s a whole bunch of evil henchman standing right above you. Seriously, how can you not notice them! #TheGoldenBat
Oh no! Piranha, the main female henchman, has disguised herself as one of our heroes! #TheGoldenBat
You can tell which of the two is the evil one ’cause the evil one is wearing a bunch mascara over her eyes. #TheGoldenBat
EVIL MASCARA! #TheGoldenBat
Well, those evil henchman sure fell into that trap pretty easy. Dumbarses. #TheGoldenBat
Oh, by the way, the kid I keep mentioning is named Emily. Just in case you were wondering. Or not. I don’t care. #TheGoldenBat
HOLY CRAP! Jackal, the henchman who looks like Wolverine, just slapped the shit out of Emily! Seriously, it was a full on BAM! 
#TheGoldenBat
Geez, for a superhero, the Golden Bat is taking his sweet time to hurry up and help everyone. #TheGoldenBat
Why won’t the filmmakers let Sonny Chiba beat the crap out of Jackal? He’s an action legend for crying out loud! #TheGoldenBat
It’s about bloody time you showed up Golden Bat! We’ve been waiting a while. #TheGoldenBat
How on earth are the henchman sticking to the wall like that? #TheGoldenBat
What the hell was that? #TheGoldenBat
Ahh, Golden Bat. You’re flying in the wrong direction. The bad guy’s ship went that way! #TheGoldenBat
Yeah, your crying is very believable, Emily. I’m totally sad for you right now. #TheGoldenBat
“Hey Naomi! Why are you wearing evil macara?” #TheGoldenBat
So Nazo’s evil plan is by getting a planet to collide with the Earth? He must have got that idea from watching MELANCHOLIA #TheGoldenBat
Wow! Nazo’s henchman are electrocuting the crap out of the old white dude. #TheGoldenBat
Geez, Nazo. It can’t be that hard to shoot at a plastic bat on a string. #TheGoldenBat
For some reason, the bad guys are using a machine to turn Two-face into the old white dude. #TheGoldenBat
Man, the old white dude’s facial expressions are hilarious! #TheGoldenBat
Geez, even when she goes to bed at night, Piranha still wears evil mascara #TheGoldenBat
Why is it that everyone at the base is wearing a white turtleneck sweater? #TheGoldenBat
Hey, everyone! Look up to the sky! There’s a plastic ball that’s on fire! #TheGoldenBat
“Hmmmm… I know my porno magazines are around here somewhere?” #TheGoldenBat
HOLY CRAP! Two-Face is choking the crap out of Emily! Geez, everyone in this film likes to abuse her. #TheGoldenBat
Now the Wolverine dude is now choking Emily too! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!!! #TheGoldenBat
Geez, the Golden Bat is awful superhero. He doesn’t bother to show up somebody is in trouble. What a jerk! #TheGoldenBat
So whatever happened to Akira? I thought he was to suppose to be the lead of this film. He’s vanished. #TheGoldenBat
Oh, wait. There he is. Never mind. #TheGoldenBat
You know instead of Piranha, the filmmakers should have called her Evil Mascara since that’s only trait that she has. #TheGoldenBat
Piranha has turned to her normal self. Yeah, that might not have been a good idea. #TheGoldenBat
So Piranha’s power is that she can go through walls? Okay. #TheGoldenBat
Yeah, I don’t think the police will be able to help out with an alien invasion, Akira. #TheGoldenBat
I’m sorry, Nazo. I can’t take you seriously as a villain when you look a mutant chipmunk. Again sorry. #TheGoldenBat
No! Nazo just killed Piranha! There was still a lot of evil mascara that she hasn’t used yet! #TheGoldenBat
Geez, the film is almost over and Sonny Chiba still hasn’t kicked any arse yet. #TheGoldenBat
ABOUT BLOODY TIME YOU SHOWED UP AGAIN, GOLDEN BAT! WHERE ARE HAVE YOU BEEN?! #TheGoldenBat
Oh, no! Two-Face has hostages! And he’s throwing them off the ship! That bastard! #TheGoldenBat
Geez, Golden Bat. Hostages are getting killed and you’re just standing around doing nothing. You jerk. #TheGoldenBat
I think that this Two-Face henchman may be more crazy than Tommy Lee Jone’s Two-Face in BATMAN FOREVER. That’s saying something. #TheGoldenBat
Man, the Golden Bat’s theme song is pretty awesome! #TheGoldenBat
Oh, whacking day! Oh, whacking day! #TheGoldenBat
The Golden Bat is just going to town on these henchman. But yet Sonny Chiba still hasn’t even fought anyone once. #TheGoldenBat
Uh, oh. Nazo. Just like the shape of your ship, you’re definitely screwed. #TheGoldenBat
Ahh, why did the screen just freeze all of a sudden? #TheGoldenBat
How did Akira and Sonny Chiba get on the ship? #TheGoldenBat
Oh, man. Dutch angles. I’m getting BATTLEFIELD EARTH flashbacks! Nooooo! #TheGoldenBat
It’s about time that Sonny Chiba got some action, even though its sadly only through gun battles *sigh* #TheGoldenBat
These Two-Face-esque henchman may be the most insane character ever put in cinema. Believe me, I’ve seen them all. #TheGoldenBat
Geez, the Two-Face guy is taking his sweet time to shoot the good guys. It’s not like they’re going anywhere. #TheGoldenBat
It has to say something when the hero’s laugh sounds way more evil than the bad guy’s laugh #TheGoldenBat
That’s right, Golden Bat! Beat the crap out of Two-Face with your whacking stick! #TheGoldenBat
Does the Golden Bat ever lower his arms down? There always raised in the air. #TheGoldenBat
You know Nazo if just got out of your spinning chair thing, you can easily get away. Oh, he did? Never mind. #TheGoldenBat
Fly Golden Bat fly! The screw is about to explode! Okay, that didn’t sound right. I apologize. Sorry everyone. #TheGoldenBat
Yes! The good guys were able to use the laser to stop the other planet crashing into Earth. Lar von Trier must be upset now. #TheGoldenBat
So long Golden Bat! Thanks for helping us all out whenever you felt like it! #TheGoldenBat
Man, the green screen in this film might be even worse than the one used in THE ROOM. That’s saying something. #TheGoldenBat
“See you later everyone! I have to go rock out and vogue in silhouette to my theme song now!” #TheGoldenBat
You know what I can’t forgive this film for? For not giving Sonny Chiba any hand-to-hand fight scenes in this film. That’s just wrong! #TheGoldenBat
Okay, Emily. You can stop saying goodbye now! You’ve already said about a billion times. #TheGoldenBat
Seriously, forget THE DARK KNIGHT, SPIDER-MAN 2, SUPERMAN: THE MOVIE, THE AVENGERS and the rest. *This* is greatest superhero film of ALL time! #TheGoldenBat
I hope everyone enjoyed reading this 24th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in June for my 25th edition, which I could be doing on one of the following three bad films: FLASH GORDON, GIGLI and PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on SuperMarcey.com soon!
– Bede Jermyn
