Hey everyone! Welcome to the 22nd edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. As you already know last month here on SuperMarcey.com I posted up poll with three bad movies and I said that whichever one out of those three films had the highest votes, I would watch and live-tweet for this column. Well, the votes are in and you all have spoken. For this instalment of Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon, you guys wanted me to watch and live-tweet… BATTLEFIELD EARTH! Will I figure out why the filmmakers decided to shoot the entire film using only Dutch angles? Does John Travolta give a new meaning to the term ‘scenery chewing performance’ in this film? Read on and find out! Enjoy!
Bede @BedeJermyn
I know I’ve said this many times in other articles, but say it again: is too late for not to watch this film? #BattlefieldEarth
Nice to see that nature is still around in the year 3000. #BattlefieldEarth
Ummm… What’s happening? This opening is confusing #BattlefieldEarth
Barry Pepper’s hair in this film is pretty epic. #BattlefieldEarth
I can’t believe that this film has audacity to steal the screen wipes from the far superior STAR WARS series. #BattlefieldEarth
Did that woman just call Barry Pepper a ‘greener’? What kind of an insult is that?! Insults in the future a pretty sucky #BattlefieldEarth
Hey Barry Pepper! You leave that statue of Pete’s Dragon alone! #BattlefieldEarth
I suppose it makes sense that the first piece of old civilisation that Barry Pepper finds is a miniature golf course #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, hi Kim Coates! I’m so sorry to see you get rope into this film too. #BattlefieldEarth
Question: why the hell are there so many Dutch angles in this film? Seriously, even THOR didn’t have this many #BattlefieldEarth
That’s probably the fakest looking laser I’ve ever seen. #BattlefieldEarth
Why is everything so green all of a sudden? #BattlefieldEarth
No! They shot Barry Pepper’s horse! He only had one day left until retirement! #BattlefieldEarth
Epic glass shattering! #BattlefieldEarth
Seriously, this scene of Barry Pepper going through a sheet of glass in slow motion goes on for like nearly 10 minutes #BattlefieldEarth
And I might add, it was shot from EVERY SINGLE ANGLE as well. All in Dutch angles of course. #BattlefieldEarth
I’m not going to say the author’s name that this film is based on (just in case I get sued), so I’ll just nickname him I. Ron Butterfly #BattlefieldEarth
You know besides all the Dutch angles, this actually a pretty visually ugly looking film in every way #BattlefieldEarth
Poor Barry Pepper. This film was suppose to be his breakthrough role to superstardom but nope. It nearly killed his career #BattlefieldEarth
Man, the designs of this aliens are so bad. They look someone dressed in a very cheap Klingon Halloween costume #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, John Travolta. Why?! WHY?! You look more hilarious than intimating as a evil alien being #BattlefieldEarth
So John Travolta thought it would be a good idea to give a Barry Pepper a gun to see if would know hot to work it? That’s a dumb idea #BattlefieldEarth
You do realise John Travolta that your complete utter stupidly just got one of your men killed, right? #BattlefieldEarth
Geez, even in a scene where there’s just two characters talking, its STILL shot in Dutch angles. #BattlefieldEarth
Poor Forest Whitaker. You can clearly tell by looking at his face, that deeply regrets signing on to this film. #BattlefieldEarth
Whoa! That one alien’s chin looks exactly like a testicle #BattlefieldEarth
Believe it or not, the real reason why John Travolta’s character is pissed off is because everyone else in this scene is trying overact him too. Nobody out acts, Travolta! #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, my God. John Travolta going at this terrible dialogue like he is quoting Shakespeare that it’s absolutely hilarious #BattlefieldEarth
You know I’ve seen so many over-the-top scenery chewing performances in my time, but Travolta’s performance here takes the cake #BattlefieldEarth
Does anybody know what the budget of this film was? Cause I’m pretty certain that it only cost a $100 to make. #BattlefieldEarth
Look how big the heels on both Travolta and Whitaker’s boots are? They must be at lest 20 inches tall or something. #BattlefieldEarth
OMG all the alien’s costumes have giant cod pieces on them! I know I shouldn’t have looked but it’s a bit hard not to notice #BattlefieldEarth
Yes, Barry Pepper. Scream at the top of your lungs so that all the bloody aliens can find you where you are. Dumb arse. #BattlefieldEarth
Seriously, no joke. I honestly have no idea what the hell is going. This film doesn’t make any sense at all. #BattlefieldEarth
Man, just when I think that Travolta’s performance couldn’t get anymore over-the-top, he becomes even more so #BattlefieldEarth
The green screen in this film is absolutely awful. It’s exactly on the level of THE ROOM #BattlefieldEarth
No! Travolta just through that guy whose name I don’t even remember over a cliff! Damn you Travolta! #BattlefieldEarth
Whoa! A ghost alien. Now I’ve seen everything. #BattlefieldEarth
So Travolta’s evil plan is to make Barry Pepper really, really, REALLY smart? Yeah, that may be a bad idea. #BattlefieldEarth
Yeah, it’s official: Travolta’s character is the dumbest evil alien in the history of the universe. #BattlefieldEarth
Why? Cause by putting Pepper in that knowledge machine, he’s basically given him and the humans the knowledge they need to beat them #BattlefieldEarth
You know Travolta, you should listen to Whitaker more cause he’s been right pretty much about everything when it comes to the human’s plan so far #BattlefieldEarth
Dammit BATTLEFIELD EARTH! Stop using screen wipes when you’re transitioning to a scene! You’re not STAR WARS!!! #BattlefieldEarth
Yeah, I think that there hasn’t been a single shot in this film that wasn’t non-tilted. #BattlefieldEarth
Whoa! Travolta is just randomly shooting cows for no apparent reason. PETA aren’t gonna be happy about this. #BattlefieldEarth
Was is it that when they film shows the Psychlos native language, is literally sounds like ‘blah, blah, blah, blah’? #BattlefieldEarth
By the way, the aliens in this film are actually called Psychlos. No, I’m serious. It’s not a joke! #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, no! Travolta has kidnapped Pepper’s girlfriend! How… I honestly have no idea. #BattlefieldEarth
I think the real reason why Whitaker shook his head just then, it was because of Travolta’s awful dialogue in that scene #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, hi Kelly Preston! #BattlefieldEarth
Whoa! That’s a pretty long obviously CGI tongue you’ve got there Kelly Preston #BattlefieldEarth
So pretty much Kelly Preston’s cameo in this film, was just showing her really long tongue? Okay. #BattlefieldEarth
Hmmm… I wonder if that alien with the testicle looking chin is related to Hugh Jackman’s character from MOVIE 43? #BattlefieldEarth
Geez, why does the CGI in this film look like it’s from a early 90s video game? #BattlefieldEarth
I don’t know why Travolta has weird looking ear plugs in his nose, but it’s pretty disturbing. #BattlefieldEarth
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Those weird nose plug things are part of the alien’s ships? Okay. #BattlefieldEarth
Either they are used for breathing purposes or actually to power and fly the ship, I honestly have no idea. #BattlefieldEarth
OMG another shot of Travolta’s cod piece! I’m absolutely disturbed right about now #BattlefieldEarth
It’s amazing that Barry Pepper’s character is so smart that he knows where to find missiles at a base in Texas #BattlefieldEarth
Yeah, this film gets more and more and more and more and more and more and more and more and MORE ridiculous as it goes on #BattlefieldEarth
It’s good that blonde dude whose name I can’t remember is willing to sacrifice himself for the good of mankind #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, okay. So those plug things that are jammed up the Psychlos’ noses are a breathing apparatus. But they look so dumb. #BattlefieldEarth
Geez, Travolta. Can you please brush your teeth! They are disgusting and gross! #BattlefieldEarth
Wow! Travolta just shot off Whitaker’s hand! Surprisingly, is taking it pretty well. #BattlefieldEarth
Wait! Hold the phone! Pepper’s characters name is Johnnie?! That means I can references to THE ROOM now! Yes!!! #BattlefieldEarth
Man, this film has the most pointless use of slow motion I have ever seen. #BattlefieldEarth
Dear Roger Christianson, you don’t have to use slow motion or dutch angles for every scene. It’s annoying. Love, Bede #BattlefieldEarth
Wow. It’s amazing that Barry Pepper was able to teach his fellow humans on how to fly a fighter jet in one week. #BattlefieldEarth
You know what? I would really love to see a version of this film where the camera isn’t tilted all the time. #BattlefieldEarth
One of the human’s in the fighter jets looks like Kurt Cobain. #BattlefieldEarth
It’s amazing that in the year 3000, all the human characters still talk with distinct American accents. #BattlefieldEarth
How hard can it be for the human’s to shoot the Psychlos? They’re walking so slow that it would be easy to hit them. #BattlefieldEarth
No! Not Kim Coates! No! #BattlefieldEarth
I suppose by sacrificing to save human kind, Kim Coates was thankful that he no longer had to be in this crappy film #BattlefieldEarth
Man, there are so many close-ups during this fight scene between Travolta and Pepper, I have no idea what’s going on #BattlefieldEarth
Wow! Barry Pepper just blew off Travolta’s arm! Just like Whitaker before, Travolta is taking it pretty well too #BattlefieldEarth
Seriously, who would have thought that one little nuclear weapon would destroy the Psychlos’ whole home planet. #BattlefieldEarth
Yeah… The humans won the war against the Psychlos… Whatever. #BattlefieldEarth
Oh, hi Johnnie! So anyways, how’s your sex life, huh? #BattlefieldEarth
See Travolta. Pepper pretty much confirmed to you, that you are definitely the dumbest alien in the entire universe #BattlefieldEarth
Wow. Not only did this film steal the screen wipes from STAR WARS, it also stole RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK’s final shot too #BattlefieldEarth
Well, that’s end of the film. If this film has taught me one thing, is that actor’s vanity projects are always a bad thing #BattlefieldEarth
I hope everyone enjoyed reading this 22nd edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in late April for my 23rd edition, which I could be doing on one of the following three bad films: CONGO, THE LOVE GURU and THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on SuperMarcey.com soon!
– Bede Jermyn
