Bede’s Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon #16: Street Fighter: The Legend Of Chun-Li

Hey everyone! Welcome to the 16th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon series. As you already know last month here on SuperMarcey.com I posted up poll with three bad movies and I said that whichever one out of those three films had the highest votes, I would watch and live-tweet for this column. Well, the votes are in and you all have spoken. For this instalment of Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon, you guys wanted me to watch and live-tweet… STREET FIGHTER: THE LEGEND OF CHUN-LI! Will I figure out if the filmmakers actually played the original video games when they made this film? Does Chris Klein give the greatest bad performance of all time? Read on and find out! Enjoy!

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Bede @BedeJermyn

Ahh… Is it too late to turn off this movie?

Nice opening credits you got there, Capcom. Well, not really.

Well, it’s nice to see that the green screen shot of San Francisco from THE ROOM is being put to good use in this film

We’re leaving on a jet plane!

You know, Chun-Li. If you don’t know the type of business your father is doing, it’s probably wasn’t legal.

I don’t get it: they could have gotten great Chinese actress to Chun-Li. Instead they got… Kristin Kreuk?

“Based on Capcom’s STREET FIGHTER video games” Well… Barely.

Wow… Kristin Kreuk’s narration is so… Dull.

Wait a minute, hold the phone. This film actually had a screenplay?

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Michael Clarke Duncan just came crashing in. Literally!

On the note: R.I.P. Michael Clarke Duncan. Films haven’t been the same without you.

I don’t know how you can a wine bottle explode like that, but that Chun-Li’s Dad did it.

Whoa! Chun-Li’s Dad just lit that chain on fire! He must learnt some things from Ghost Rider.

Oh, hai Neal McDonough! I have honestly have no idea what accent you are doing right now.

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Neal is suppose to be playing M. Bison?! Yeah, clearly the makers behind this film never played any of the games.

Also this film was directed by the same guy who directed the film adaptation of DOOM, which pretty much explains EVERYTHING

Why does Chu- Li’s Dad have a draw outside in the garden?

So… We’re not going to get an explanation to what happened to Chun-Li’s Dad, are we?

Oh, my God. The green screen in this film just keeps getting worse and worse.

That scroll that Chun Li is looking at, looks like the same one out of MORTAL KOMBAT. I wish I was watching that film instead right now

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Wait… Chun Li-is suppose to be Chinese, but she doesn’t know how to read the language?!

Uh, oh. I can smell a cheesy sentimental tear-jerking scene is coming on.

Oh, dear God. Neal is still doing that awful Irish accent.

Was M. Bison ever Irish? Cause I’m pretty sure he wasn’t

Neal McDonough has the creepiest piercing blue eyes I have ever seen.

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Hey! I didn’t know Casey Jones was in this film? Oh, wait. That’s not him.

Moon Bloodgood. Seriously, what an awesome name for an actor!

Oh yeah! The best worst character introduction ever is about to come up!

CHRIS

Yes! The best worst part of the whole film has finally arrived: Chris Klein!

Best. Character. Ever! Well, in the most hilariously bad way I mean.

You can tell that Klein is trying so hard to be a bad arse, but it just its clearly its not working for him. It’s hilarious!

Also you can definitely that he is trying to channel Clint Eastwood in his performance too. It’s amazing!

Oh! Chun-Li’s Dad is actually still alive! Well… That’s good to know. I guess. 

I swear Neal McDonough lets his blue eyes do all the acting. Or lack there of I should say.

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I don’t know what’s more sad: Chun-Li’s Mum has died or seeing Kristin trying really hard to emote

Ummm… I’m pretty sure that’s actually a letter, lady.

Oh, man. Chris Klein. Oh, man. His performance… Oh, man.

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Man, the dialogue in this film is so bad! Nobody talks like a normal person at all in this film.

I’m pretty sure you could have worn more than just a tank-top and shorts while walking in the rain, Chun-Li.

I honestly have no idea what the plot to this film, it doesn’t make any sense at all.

Boo hoo! A rich girl is having a hard time living on the streets! Seriously, my heart is bleeding for you. Not.

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“Day after day, I searched for Gen” Why don’t you just look for him in the phonebook? It would be much easier.

You know for someone whose been living on the streets for a while, Chun-Li’s hair and make-up is still perfect.

Oh, for crying out loud! Can you please stop with the narration, film! It’s not needed!

Oh, isn’t that nice. That sweet old lady gave Chun-Li a spring roll. Yeah, that wouldn’t happen in real life.

Yeah, I don’t know how Chun-Li can do those MATRIX style gravity defying flips like that. It’s so dumb.

Oh, hai Robin Shou! I haven’t seen you in anything since MORTAL KOMBAT: ANNIHILATION

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“My name is Liu Kan-Ahh, I mean Gen. Yes, that’s right. Gen. Yes.”

Yeah, Gen’s advice doesn’t make any sense.

Ummm… Where did that ball of energy that Gen created come from?!

Hmmm… I wonder who was the worst ‘martial artist’ Robin Shou had to train with: Kristin Kreuk or Chris Farley?

“What about our families?” “The children have been returned” We’ll, except for the ones that they didn’t want back

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Wait a sec, isn’t Bison’s plan the EXACT same plan as the one that the villain in ROMEO MUST DIE had?

I’m asking cause both this film and ROMEO MUST DIE were directed by the same person. Yes, this film had a director. I know weird.

I like how Klein just makes out with Bloodgood… For no apparent reason. Its not like those guards knew who they were.

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“It had to be done” Nah, I think you’re just a perv, Nash.

How can Balrog not notice Chu- Li standing not far from him? It’s not she’s hiding that well.

Chu- Li almost fell on that working buzzsaw. Ummm… I starting to think that Gen is pretty insane.

Yeah, Klein and Bloodgood have the sexual chemistry of a plank of wood.

Well, its nice that actually had something from Chun Li’s look in the games for the scene with the hair buns

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Yeah, it’s clear that the actors playing Chun-Li and Catana have never done martial arts before.

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Chun-Li just did her whirl-kick from the game. Yeah, it doesn’t look as cool in real life as it does in the game 

Oh, Chris Klein. You’re so brilliantly awful in this film.

Bison is using Catana’s lifeless corpse as a boxing bag. That’s… Disturbing.

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Oh, man. The look that Chris Klein gives to that guy is hilarious!

“Tell me about Bison?” OF COURSE! Woops! Sorry, wrong STREET FIGHTER movie.

Man, flashback scene about Bison’s past is weird.

Wait a sec… If Bison’s Irish’s parent died when he was a baby and then he raised in a orphanage, how come he’s got a Irish accent?

Ahhh… Did Bison just rip a baby out of his wife’s stomach with his own two hands?! o_O

This scene has gone all BREAKING DAWN on us!

Man, this film has gone to the point where it can never ever, ever, ever, EVER go back.

Geez, it didn’t take Chun-Li that long to get those groceries. She was only gone for like 20 seconds.

Oh, Kristin. Please don’t try to emote. It doesn’t work for you.

Man, this film looks really cheap. I think it must have cost like $100 to make.

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Isn’t Vega suppose to be Spanish? He doesn’t look Spanish.

Well, it’s nice to see that one of THE BLACK EYED PEAS members is doing something while the’re waiting for will.i.amis busy with an actually career 

Man. That was a really short fight. A bit anticlimactic actually.

Well… They cleared out that office pretty quickly.

Oh, man. Klein’s facial expressions are gold

I’m sorry, Neal Donough. There’s only one true M. Bison and that man is the late great Raul Julia

Oh, isn’t that sweet. Chun-Li is reunited with her Dad. Well, maybe not in the right circumstances but still.

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“You see, your Father has been the milk of my business. But even milk has a expiration date” ACTUAL DIALOUGE FROM THE FILM PEOPLE!

Man, Neal McDonough’s accent is so inconsistent. It goes back-and-fourth between being Irish and American.

lol A woman just threw a water melon at Michael Clarke Duncan’s head.

Yeah! Gen’s alive!

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Did Gen’s hair go from being grey to black?

SERIOUSLY, WHERE ARE THESE ENERGY BALLS COMING FROM?!

Wow. That was the worst ‘dropping a glass’ acting I’ve ever seen. You’re so brilliant, Chris Klein

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Seriously, Chris Klein needs to be given a special award for his ‘acting’ in this film. It’s awfully good!

Yeah, I think if you were smacked around by a gas tank in real life, you’d be dead.

NASH OUT!

Let off some steam, Balrog!

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Geez, this whole thing with Bison and his daughter is dumb and doesn’t make any sense

NASH OUT! Best line ever!

Seriously, how did that guard not notice those cops before he turned around and walk the other way?

Come on, Chris! We need one more NASH OUT before this film is over!

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Wait. That guy who screamed after Bison had kicked him, didn’t Nash shoot him in the head earlier?!

*In a Bale Batman voice* WHERE IS SHEEEE?!!!!

Yeah, I don’t think some of these martial arts moves would actually work like that in real life

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SERIOUSLY, WHERE ARE THESE ENERGY BALLS COMING FROM?! I WANT ANSWERS DAMMIT!

Whoa! Chun-Li just twisted Bison’s head ALL the way around with her feet!

Yeah, it’s official. Chris Klein is the only fun thing about this terrible film.

Oh, geez. This dull narration is still going.

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Seriously, out of all the STREET FIGHTERS characters they could have made a film on, did we really need one on Chun-Li?

Well, clearly this scene is only here so that they can set up for a sequel, which thankfully never happened.

Well, that’s end of the film. Yeah, I think I’m going to to the Van Damme STREET FIGTHER. At lest that was entertainingly bad. 

Although, Chris Klein is the best part of this new film. Now where’s my spin-off featuring only him dammit! NASH OUT!

I hope everyone enjoyed reading this 16th edition of my Bad Movie Tweet-A-Thon! Keep a look out in late October for my special Halloween themed 17th edition, which could one of the following three bad horror films: I KNOW WHO KILLED ME, LEPRECHAUN or NIGHT OF THE LEPUS. Which one will it be? Vote on the poll which will be posted on SuperMarcey.com soon!

– Bede Jermyn

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